The Real Life of Hello Kitty!

The Hello Kitty Conspiracy

Asteroid 34  : IFLA Verlag, 2032

• 1963 - Luna E-6 No.2 ( Sputnik 25) a soviet spacecraft landed on the Dark Side of the Moon and encountered a new specie of lunar (or lunatic) creatures, later known as Hello Kittys, the mission is kept under secret forever pretending the complete failure of the mission and the end of the Sputnik project
• 1964-1973 To destroy the western cultural imperialism based on Walt Disney, Hanna-Barbera, Barbie and fast food chains, the Soviet Imperialism is seeking revenge thinking of using the creatures like new matrioska. The creatures are soon addictet to vodka and any other psychotropic substances, the KGB wants to make use of it under the old formula "we give you the booze and we take your soul"
• 1974-1976 Yuri Vladimirovich Andropov, head of the KGB contact the japanese comunist activist and designer Yuko Shimizu who pretend to be the creator of  Hello Kitty. They start the company SaNriO (Soviet Nihon Imperialism) with the aim to brain wash milions of kids with the new Sov-hongo weapon
• 1980' The Hello Kittys soon realize their chance to overrule the world with their cutiness, Comunism is considered a real danger to the completion of their plan and use the capitalism and consumism to have success in a short time. Hystorians consider them  responsible for the end of the cold war and the fall of the Berlin's wall
• 1979-1982 the film director Sir Ridley Scott makes two documentaries about the real danger of Hello Kittys (Alien and Blade Runner) but his message is misunderstood
• 1990'  time to overtake the human beings weak minds creating series of extremely sucessfull TV shows known as reality TV
• 2000' Hello Kittys take control over Google and SaNriO produces over 22.000 diferent items of any imaginable kind of the cute "Kitty Chan"
• although just children, females and the whole japanese population are by their nature easily addicted to the Hello Kittys, some key people are "employed" for the conquer of the world, 2 of the most famous are Geroge W. Bush 43rd USA President and Silvio Berlusconi Italy's Prime Minister
• 2010 a group of Library and Information Science students at the Humboldt Universitaet zu Berlin, discover the Hello Kitty Conspiracy and start an international new world wide web (The Otlet Net) within libraries around the planet together with the Ridley Scott Foundation
• 2012 scientific studies prove that only librarians, chess players and female with very large breasts are completely immune to the Hello Kitty's brain washing
• 2013 to celebrate their 50 anniversary on Earth, Hello Kittys announce their real origin, the world population is thrilled 
• 2018 The Hello Kitty Currency is introduced, all other currency are dismissed
• 2019 Introduction of the Hello Kitty Religion
• 2022 Hello Kittys control the world food production with a "new green product" Soylent Green
• 2025 human beings are moved into cities underground  the surfice called Kittylands
• 2028 Hello Kittys are the new lords of planet Earth, a one year long of celebration is held at the Kitty's Colosseum and at the Kitty's Basilica
• 2030 the few milions of immune Earthians escape the planets to asteroids
• 2031 the IFLA opens his first Universal Library "Farenheith 451" on Asteroid 1